Thursday, May 3, 2012

Martyr and Soldier

I took a photo of this butterfly two days ago. It was a beautiful, sunny day. And it was (at least I think so) a beautiful photo. And I made it look weird...
Butterfly

I guess it was coming. Slowly and in a back-stabbing way. What exactly was coming? Sadness. Maybe depression, I don't know. I just know I'm losing my energy and starting to become more and more pessimistic. And here I am, telling all those people it's gonna get better, it's gonna be fine. And I'm not lying. Why do I feel like crap then? Tired, worried, sad, alone and scared. I hate posts like these, but I have to let it out.

***

I like to change subject when I feel like this... Did you know today is my name day? Yep, Saint Alexander. According to catholic.org (well, that's a site I never thought I'd be visiting) he died in 313. 

''Martyr and soldier, who tried to shield a fellow Christian, St. Antonina. Antonina was a hunted victim during the persecutions conducted under the reign of Emperor Maximian. Alexander tried to change clothes with Antonina so that he could escape from the Roman officials. They were discovered, and both were condemned. They were tortured and burned to death.'' 

But noone is gonna die today, because a wise man once said: 
''It's bad luck to kill a man on your name day.''
 
Now I feel like knowing more about you. Tell me dear ones, who's your Saint? Do you celebrate your name day? If so, how?

Thanks for looking and commenting!

28 comments:

  1. I am from Holland, we don't do name days. Hope you will chear up soon. Love your site. Bought a few Guppy's thanks to your swatches. Or was it Cuddy. A pity it didn't stay on with the uv coat experiment. Kind regards, Jessica.

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    1. Thanks, Jessica! Hee hee, I think they're Guppy, but the writing is so weird it could also be CUDDV. That UV top coat didn't turn out to be so good as I expected. It started chipping on me.

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  2. Hi, Sasha! I'm sorry to read that you feel that way, but sometimes it's just how it is. Hopefully you'll find some way to cheer you up and look a bit more at the bright side of things.
    As to name day: it isn't celebrated here in Brazil and anyways, my name isn't even Brazilian. Hehe... Mauni sounds like a native Brazilian name and that's why my parents named me after their friend, but I found out it's actually an Indian name. I didn't pursue more on the subject, because I like the fact that it's pretty unique and that my parents gave it to me thinking of a loved one. =)

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    1. Hey, Mauni! Yep, I know. Ups and downs. I don't know why I thought name days are celebrated everywhere were there's christian religion. I guess I don't know much about it. =) To me, Mauni actually does sound like a native (Indian) name. And yes, it is unique. You're the first Mauni I met. =D

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  3. Dear Nihrida,

    your (really special)post made me feel somehow good, although I am getting sadder and sadder too by every moment that passes.(maybe its spring?and the plants exhale some pheromone that makes us feel like this?) And the picture is beautifully weird

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    1. I'm glad my post made you feel good. I hope we'll stop being sad and be awesome instead. ;)

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  4. I don't have a name day but if I did I'd take the day off and party a little, celebrate! I hope you feel better soon, gotta have the bad days to make the good ones happen. Life is sweet and sour taking turns.

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    1. =) I know, but I really hate the downs or with your words - the sour part of it. Thanks for your words!

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  5. In the Orthodox calendar St.Alexander's is thε 30th of August. Maybe celebrate that, too. My nameday was on the 24th (St. Elisavet).

    Life is not easy, going through a single day is not easy. Don't let it all get the best of you. That's what I do and I try to keep moving forward every single day no matter how hard it feels like. I'm not going to offer you any new age/ slogan type of advice, I really hate them. Just don't give up and speak out when you feel like that. You may feel a tiny bit better.

    Happy nameday:)

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    1. Really? I didn't know that. Well, I don't really celebrate my name day since I'm not too religious anyway. Thanks for your words of encouragement. =)

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    2. I'm not particularly religious either, but an extra reason to have friends over and celebrate is always nice!

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  6. Who's my Saint? Saint Daria
    Do you celebrate your name day? If so, how? No I dont I jsut found out about because of your post.

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  7. Hang in there.. YOU'RE NOT ALONE! {{Hugs}}

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  8. I don't have a saint (I think?). Anyways I'm not into religion. But I have a day for my name and it's November 22 :) My middle name is a goddess in Nordic mythology that isn't in the swedish calender :P

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    1. I'm not into religion either, but I still find it interesting - the saints and their stories. I guess your saint is St. Cecilia. Helga is your middle name? That's goddess of fire, right?

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  9. I'm sorry to hear you're feeling worse again, hope it's just something temporary! And I personally don't mind you telling us about it at all. It might make you feel a little better.

    As for Name Day, I don't think I have a saint... Do you have any idea where I could find that out for certain? Honestly, I didn't even know about it up until a few years ago, when I was back in Sarajevo and my cousin was having her "imendan" - being a child from a mixed catholic and orthodox marriage my parents never tried to "force" me into any religion but left the choice up to me. Thought it was pretty awesome to have an "extra birthday" like that!

    Anyway, sretan imendan to you, and take care!

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  10. I think it's good to be able to talk about the sadness like you do. I tend to become introverted and try to hide it, and it really only makes it worse. Just don't blame yourself for not always being at your best, it's normal with ups and downs and sometimes maybe you just need to take things a little bit slower and reflect upon life. You know that it will pass like it always does.

    The photo is very beautiful, I guess there is beauty in sadness too!

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  11. Ah, then it's my Saint Day too! (Since 'Sandra' comes from Alexandra/Alexander...) The only cultures that I know of who truly celebrate their name days are the Central/Eastern European ones (in other words, ones with strong Slavic backgrounds). I wish we did that more here in the USA. Oh well!

    "Keep your chin up," as we say here!

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  12. Hey sweetie. Haven't commented in a looong time but I'm still reading you everyday. I'm sorry you feel sad, but it happens, sometimes you just can't control it, all you can do is take a deep breath and wait for it to go...
    My name isn't on the "first calendar", but after some reseach, my Dad found it was celebrated on Oct, 15th, which is St Therese d'Avila, the one who succumbed to God's grace after being "pierced to ecstasy" by its light, which has led to centuries of... interpretations ;)

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  13. Ooh sweetie, I hope you'll feel better soon! *hugs*

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  14. First of all, I for one, love the picture of the butterfly!

    Like you, I get REALLY down sometimes (I know I posted something about it a few months ago). But I always find, it makes the ups that much better. I hope you move quickly to your ups!!

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  15. I just send you a big big hug!

    I never celebrate my name day, it's usually not shown in calendars here. I'm not much into religion but I learnt from that catholic site that "my" saint entered a convent at 7yrs old, then became blind and paralized and sick...=_= Poor Alice

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  16. Hang in there honey! You know where to find me if you need me. HUGS. <3

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  17. I am sorry you are feeling less happy lately, hopefully it turns around quickly! That picture of that butterfly is really pretty but also shows your mood I think.

    My name day seems to be July 15th, Saint Bonaventure. Never really checked it but I like the idea of having a party in the summer instead of my own birthday, which is in the winter.

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  18. I don't find that photo looking weird - it's pure beauty. Melancholic, yes, and bitter-sweet, yes. But not weird at all. And it's green-toned, so there is a whole lot of hope in it. It's calming and, yeah, just beautiful. Sorry for raving about it so much, but this picture seems to hit a nerve and really touches me. Do you have a larger version of it, so I could use it as my desktop background (if you're okay with it, of course)?

    Feeling bad always is hard and not easy to bear, I know. I hate those phrases like "somes rain, comes shine", "every cloud has a silver lining" and so on, but unfortunately, they contain truth. Without pain we wouldn't know what joy is.

    I don't have a name day as my first name is too "exotic" (what I appreciate, to be honest - there are more than enough things/people/streets/aso. named after saints, don't have to line up with them). But in my surrounding, noone celebrates (or even thinks of) his name day anyway. If any, then the "older people" (60+). ;) Seems to be a dying tradition, at least here in germany.

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